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gg21

BOD is shorthand for Board of Directors. Did you know that? I’ll never forget the day that secret chunk of knowledge was revealed to me. I felt so smart, like my level of professionalism jumped from “soggy sock” to “red hot lover” in an instant. At that time, I was a member of the Puget Sound American Marketing Association’s board. We did planning/visioning retreats every year. I didn’t enjoy them.

This weekend, I’ll be attending the VCC staff and BOD planning/visioning retreat. This will be the first planning retreat I have been a part of with VCC. At least, I think it will be the first one. I’m totally going to get fired if it turns out we had a planning retreat just three months ago and I have completely forgotten the entire event. Anyways, I’m very excited. Ya see, I secretly love planning and visioning. It’s true. Mission and vision and purpose… well, they are the wind beneath my wings. In hindsight, I’ve realized every bout of depression I’ve had has been fueled by the unanswered question, “what’s it all mean, what’s the purpose of it all?” That is to say, if I don’t have a clear mission and purpose, I literally go insane.

For Christmas, Ione wanted one thing and one thing only: the Girl Gourmet Cupcake Maker. She didn’t want Barbies, video games, or My Little Ponies. She didn’t even want a Camaro with a princess riding a flying donut airbrushed on the hood. For her, it was all about the Girl Gourmet Cupcake Maker. I guess the VCC BOD planning/visioning retreat is my Girl Gourmet Cupcake Maker.

from disciple to partner

Several months ago, I off handedly mentioned the chili cheese omelette©. to my good friend, Joel Bratt. Much to my dismay, this Michigan native had never even heard of a chili cheese omelette™. Right then and there, I committed to join Joel in a spiritual journey, a quest if you will. The Rastafari may have the herb; but, we have the chili cheese omelette®. Over the course of several months, Joel and I have searched across two counties and three zip codes to find the ultimate chili cheese omelette™. Sure, we’ve found some disappointment along the way. But, as I explained to my young (and good looking) padowan, disappointment is just part of fulfillment.

This morning, we found fulfillment. I present you with the 6 egg chili cheese omelette©.

the promised land

6 eggs sound daunting for one man, no matter what his level of spiritual maturity. So, when we discovered the hash browns were bottomless, we opted to share. As we wiped the last of the sour cream infused chili juice with our slices of white toast from our plates, something glorious happened. Joel looked at me and said, “I think I could do another.” So, we did. Today, a disciple became a partner.

I love church work.

And, now, I think I will nap.

I’ve lost my creative edge. First, there was that damned election and, quite seriously, that thing sucked all the energy out of my life. I just wanted to die when it was over. Instead, we got a new puppy. Then the snow came and vacation and winter malaise. I don’t wanna blog anymore, but I know how disappointed you will be if I don’t. SO! I’ve made a short list of things that I was going to write about during the past two months if I had had enough energy.

1. In high school, I was surrounded by hessians. They were everywhere. We got along but I hated their music and they hated mine. I really hate metal. But, due to lunchtime ghetto blaster wars and riding in Bobby Randles’ Duster, I know at least one line to every heavy metal song written between 1982 and 1988. Something took over my decision making faculties on November 7th and I downloaded 19 songs by Stryper and their nemeses: Maiden, Crüe, and Priest. For over a week I listened to those songs over and over and over again. I listened to nothing else. And, I hated every second of it.

2. I had an extremely profound thought about “core values.”

3. Thelonious, Ione and I were driving in the car. Thelonious said, “Hey dad, I learned some new words to a Christmas carol: Deck the hall with balls of money, fa lala la lalalala, tis the season to be greedy, fa lala la lalalala.” Ione immediately interrupted him and scolded, “Stop singing that! Your Lord would not appreciate it!”

4. A quote from The Shaping of Things to Come
“An incarnational ministry draws not-yet-Christians toward God by exciting curiosity through storytelling, by provoking a sense of wonder and awe, by showing extraordinary love, by exploring how God has touched our lives, and by focusing on Jesus.”

5. My facial hair has grown into an homage to Castro’s Revolution

6. I called our new puppy “the pooper.” Ione asked why I called her that and I said it was because she (the puppy, not Ione) looked like poop. Ione thought that was ridiculous because the puppy is black and white. I asked her, “Haven’t you ever pooped black and white?” She looked incredulous and answered, “No! You only poop black and white in Canada!”

7. I made Thelonious sit at the dinner table for an hour and fifteen minutes and then go straight to bed because he wouldn’t eat three green beans. I think Erika was more angry at me than he was.

Now that I have all that out of my system, I might start writing more.